i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
We talked him into tasing himself.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
