It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
