What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Randomize
