I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize