go do what you do best...puke behind churches
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
Randomize
