Texts From Last Night

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  (305): View more from Florida

  alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.

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  (305): alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog. http://tfl.nu/iy0a
  Replies (15) Good night (1049) Bad night (3154) Order T-Shirt
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Ohh that happened after I started to cry.

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  (604): I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous? (778): Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely. (604): Ohh that happened after I started to cry. http://tfl.nu/giil
  Replies (14) Good night (823) Bad night (4345)
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava

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  (617): His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava http://tfl.nu/q9zi
  Replies (164) Good night (2110) Bad night (3391) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?

  (301): View more from Maryland

  yes! wait why?

  (240): View more from Maryland

  because i found it in my pocket this morning...

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  (240): were you wearing a green and blue thong last night? (301): yes! wait why? (240): because i found it in my pocket this morning... http://tfl.nu/rs9c
  Replies (39) Good night (11222) Bad night (690)
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.

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  (216): She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass. http://tfl.nu/vn76
  Replies (25) Good night (4716) Bad night (1710) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.

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  (678): I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life. http://tfl.nu/5bor
  Replies (17) Good night (4519) Bad night (773) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.

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  (630): Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box. http://tfl.nu/2fsf
  Replies (23) Good night (6716) Bad night (824) Order T-Shirt
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.

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  (478): I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been. http://tfl.nu/xper
  Replies (3) Good night (798) Bad night (2595) Order T-Shirt
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  (516): View more from New York

  my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now

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  (516): my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now http://tfl.nu/4n6q
  Replies (13) Good night (1274) Bad night (1968) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.

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  (541): There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet. http://tfl.nu/xrf4
  Replies (12) Good night (2392) Bad night (816) Order T-Shirt
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  (213): View more from California

  Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.

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  (213): Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics. http://tfl.nu/j3g0
  Replies (5) Good night (1683) Bad night (536) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.

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  (623): It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too. http://tfl.nu/xu8j
  Replies (15) Good night (507) Bad night (3164) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...

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  (770): Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less... http://tfl.nu/7jyd
  Replies (5) Good night (1393) Bad night (463) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(

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  (757): Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :( http://tfl.nu/ztju
  Replies (25) Good night (3293) Bad night (562)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.

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  (509): The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift. http://tfl.nu/2o45
  Replies (9) Good night (433) Bad night (1669)

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