Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
