I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Less talking, more tequila
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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