Betty ford says i'm here all night
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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