great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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