ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
