no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
