U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
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