She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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