try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
