are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
Randomize
