the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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