I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
