Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Randomize
