A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
