Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
I need moral support for this bender
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize
