I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize