They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
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