i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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