I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
seriously i just wanna be friends
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila