he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize