I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
