I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
