you mean i was at the winter classic?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize
