toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
