you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
