I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I deserve this hangover.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
