I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize
