I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
