well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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