I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize