My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize