i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck