Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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