Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I'm skeptical of all drag queens.

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  (832): I'm skeptical of all drag queens. http://tfl.nu/szh0
  Replies (13) Good night (970) Bad night (1564)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I would go down on you faster than GM stock

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  (714): I would go down on you faster than GM stock http://tfl.nu/ai9f
  Replies (32) Good night (7857) Bad night (830)
• Favorite

  (440): View more from Ohio

  we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.

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  (440): we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now. http://tfl.nu/0eqq
  Replies (9) Good night (3756) Bad night (1025)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  we're about an hour out, how's the weather?

  (720): View more from Colorado

  cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.

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  (303): we're about an hour out, how's the weather? (720): cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home. http://tfl.nu/na0o
  Replies (14) Good night (6212) Bad night (1229)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother

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  (240): It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother http://tfl.nu/obkn
  Replies (5) Good night (882) Bad night (3030)
• Favorite

  (757): View more from Virginia

  We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.

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  (757): We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea. http://tfl.nu/rh0l
  Replies (5) Good night (2450) Bad night (812)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.

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  (623): It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too. http://tfl.nu/xu8j
  Replies (15) Good night (773) Bad night (3439)
• Favorite

  (631): View more from New York

  She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.

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  (631): She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink. http://tfl.nu/f50x
  Replies (20) Good night (1474) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!

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  (205): A beer is a heart your wish makes!!! http://tfl.nu/w148
  Replies (4) Good night (1507) Bad night (637)
• Favorite

  (972): View more from Texas

  I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?

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  (972): I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right? http://tfl.nu/cvur
  Replies (3) Good night (497) Bad night (850)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.

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  (601): Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you. http://tfl.nu/w325
  Replies (3) Good night (673) Bad night (678)
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here

  (702): View more from Nevada

  Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.

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  (313): Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here (702): Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze. http://tfl.nu/43v0
  Replies (1) Good night (761) Bad night (479)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?

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  (617): How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it? http://tfl.nu/hmuk
  Replies (9) Good night (499) Bad night (774)
• Favorite

  (309): View more from Illinois

  I need vitamin water and Jesus :/

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  (309): I need vitamin water and Jesus :/ http://tfl.nu/afzj
  Replies (2) Good night (608) Bad night (349)
• Favorite

  (479): View more from Arkansas

  I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.

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  (479): I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal. http://tfl.nu/vh0f
  Replies (0) Good night (900) Bad night (242)

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