Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?