I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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