VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Being drunk with magicians is fucking mind blowing. This Asian guy just made a platypus appear and disappear. This is not a drill.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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