coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize