Farmville is her only friend.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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