i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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