it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
i wish my penis had a tongue
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
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