States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I just found a bag of teeth...
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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