I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
