i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
