Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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