yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
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i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
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She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
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